Category: Everything

  • mike huckabee would like custody of the produce aisle

    mike huckabee would like custody of the produce aisle

    Mike Huckabee tried to turn cherry tomatoes, seedless watermelons, GPS, cell phones, and USB drives into a geopolitical loyalty test. The inventions… Read more →

    I reblogged a post fact-checking Mike Huckabee’s claim that people who oppose Israel should surrender a small pile of modern conveniences, including cell phones, car navigation, USB drives, cherry tomatoes, and seedless watermelons. Apparently the produce aisle is part of the diplomatic corps now.

    The clip comes from a speech Huckabee gave at the Tel Aviv Stock Exchange’s Atlas Award ceremony in May. He told Israel’s critics, in effect, that rejecting the country should mean giving up everything it had supposedly invented. The list has continued circulating because it is an unusually pure example of a familiar political maneuver: take a complicated history, put little national flags next to each object, and then present grocery shopping as a binding referendum on foreign policy.

    There are two problems here. The obvious one is that several claims are wrong. The more interesting one is that even the claims containing a piece of truth do not prove what Huckabee wants them to prove.

    the watermelon has declined citizenship

    A halved seedless watermelon showing red flesh with only small pale undeveloped seeds
    Seedless watermelon. Photo by Scott Ehardt, public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

    The modern seedless watermelon was developed from triploid breeding work by Japanese plant scientist Hitoshi Kihara beginning in the late 1930s. The National Watermelon Promotion Board traces it to Kihara’s research in Japan, and the University of Illinois Extension explains the chromosome trick that makes the fruit mostly sterile.

    Israel has absolutely done important agricultural research. That does not cause Professor Kihara to vanish in a puff of patriotic PowerPoint transitions.

    the cherry tomato contains a smaller, more annoying truth

    Red cherry tomatoes arranged in a clear plastic produce package
    Cherry tomatoes. Photo by Evan-Amos, CC0, via Wikimedia Commons.

    Cherry tomatoes existed centuries before the state of Israel. Tomato domestication reaches back through Indigenous agriculture in the Americas; the historical record is complicated, but it is not hiding a surprise origin story in a Jerusalem laboratory. A USDA-indexed review describes the competing South American and Mexican domestication histories, while a scholarly history of the specific Israeli claim found references to cherry-shaped tomatoes going back hundreds of years.

    Israeli scientists Nachum Kedar and Haim Rabinowitch did make an important contribution. They bred varieties with better flavor, longer shelf life, and qualities that made cherry tomatoes easier to sell commercially. Hebrew University’s own profile of Kedar’s work emphasizes long shelf life, taste, and disease resistance. That is real work. It is just not the same sentence as “invented cherry tomatoes.”

    This is how the myth stays alive: a meaningful improvement gets promoted into immaculate conception because “helped turn an existing crop into a global supermarket product” will not fit on the bumper sticker.

    the USB drive has several fathers and would like them to stop fighting

    A small silver-and-black USB flash drive viewed from above
    USB flash drive. Photo by Dori, public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

    The USB flash drive is the claim where the corrective reblog also becomes too tidy. Israel’s M-Systems filed a 1999 patent for a USB-based flash disk, and Dov Moran is often credited as one of its inventors. Singapore’s Trek 2000 was the first company known to sell a product under the ThumbDrive name. IBM engineer Shimon Shmueli submitted a competing invention disclosure, and China’s Netac filed its own patent claim. IEEE Spectrum and the National Library Board of Singapore both tell the story as a genuine dispute, not a clean national trophy presentation.

    And the object itself depended on Japanese flash memory, the multinational development of the USB standard, semiconductor manufacturing across countries, and years of engineering that do not become less important because one patent arrived first.

    innovation is a terrible loyalty oath

    Car navigation is the same sort of category error. The underlying GPS network is a U.S.-owned system operated by the U.S. Space Force. Japanese automakers pioneered early in-car navigation systems. Israeli-founded Waze later made an enormous contribution to turn-by-turn, traffic-aware navigation. “Car navigation” is not one invention sitting in a glass case with one flag behind it. It is a stack.

    Cell phones are a stack, too. So are computers, medical tests, crops, and nearly every other thing politicians like to assign to a country when they need history to perform a little unpaid public relations.

    But suppose Huckabee’s entire list were accurate. Suppose one country had single-handedly invented every object on it, plus the air fryer and the little plastic table that keeps pizza boxes from touching the cheese. That still would not settle a political argument about what a government is doing now. A useful invention is not a moral gift card that can be redeemed against criticism forever.

    My phone can contain Israeli technology, American technology, Japanese technology, Chinese manufacturing, Taiwanese chips, and code written by somebody in Poland who has not slept since Tuesday. None of those facts requires me to outsource my conscience to the supply chain.

    The most honest version of this story is also the least useful for propaganda: people in different places built on one another’s work, sometimes cooperatively, sometimes competitively, and usually messily. The watermelon is Japanese science grown from an African crop. The tomato is Indigenous American agriculture reshaped by breeders around the world. The USB drive emerged from overlapping claims across Israel, Singapore, China, Japan, and the United States.

    Huckabee wanted a shopping list of reasons criticism should stop. What he accidentally assembled was a pretty good argument against treating human knowledge as national property.


    Source note: The speech was delivered in May 2026; contemporary context is available from Middle East Eye. Featured image: official 2025 portrait by the U.S. Embassy in Israel, public domain, via Wikimedia Commons.

  • if you call yourself a golden retriever, people may say sit

    if you call yourself a golden retriever, people may say sit

    dating apps reward us for turning ourselves into instantly legible archetypes. unfortunately, metaphors are package deals. Read more →

    the funniest thing about calling yourself a golden retriever on a dating app is that you are asking strangers to take a metaphor seriously, but only in the flattering directions.

    you would like us to picture loyal, upbeat, affectionate, and delighted to see us. sure. lovely. but dogs also bark, need supervision, eat things that are not food, and occasionally have to be told to get off the furniture. metaphors are not à la carte.

    dating profiles are tiny branding exercises

    a dating profile gives you a few photographs, a handful of prompts, and just enough room to construct a version of yourself that can be understood before someone’s thumb gets impatient. naturally, we reach for shorthand. adventurous. sarcastic. fluent in movie quotes. golden retriever.

    the phrase usually means a partner who is warm, loyal, social, and openly enthusiastic. The Knot’s definition emphasizes supportiveness and devotion, while a 2024 TIME essay puts the trope in a larger family of internet labels that try to describe men by how they orient themselves toward a partner. both are nicer than “i own three quarter-zips and become emotionally unavailable during football season,” which is presumably why the dog won.

    A fluffy golden retriever puppy standing in a grassy yard.
    Golden retriever puppy photographed by Scott, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY 2.0.

    the trouble starts when a label stops describing a vibe and begins functioning as a character reference. “golden retriever” can become a way to announce that you are safe, uncomplicated, and emotionally available without demonstrating any of those qualities. it is the dating-app equivalent of a restaurant describing itself as a neighborhood institution before the neighborhood has had a chance to vote.

    maybe you really are cheerful and affectionate. excellent. the world needs more of that. but if your entire self-description rests on being playfully doglike, you cannot act scandalized when somebody playfully uses a dog verb. you opened this kennel.

    every archetype comes with terms and conditions

    internet dating archetypes are appealing because they make personality feel sortable. the golden retriever goes with the black cat. the extrovert adopts the introvert. one person talks to the waiter, and the other knows when it is time to leave the party. a relationship becomes a two-panel comic that can be understood without anyone having to explain their actual needs.

    sometimes that shorthand is accurate, and sometimes it is just a costume with good search-engine optimization. real people do not remain on brand. the sunny one gets tired. the mysterious one wants reassurance. the allegedly low-maintenance one has, in fact, developed several maintenance requirements.

    A wet golden retriever sitting on a sandy beach beside blue water.
    Wet golden retriever photographed by Tsumugii, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY-SA 4.0.

    that does not make the labels useless. it just means they are introductions, not warranties. “golden retriever energy” can tell me that you aspire to be kind, enthusiastic, and present. wonderful. now comes the part where you have to behave that way when you are bored, annoyed, embarrassed, or asked to bark.

    the reblog works because it completes the transaction. if you put a dog breed in the brochure, somebody is eventually going to test the product. sit. stay. communicate directly about your feelings. apparently one of these commands is much harder than the others.

  • oblivion remastered faithfully restored the part where the corpse disappears

    oblivion remastered faithfully restored the part where the corpse disappears

    I bought Oblivion Remastered on Switch 2 for the soothing combination of open-world wandering and half-watching television. The game responded by misplacing… Read more →

    i bought The Elder Scrolls IV: Oblivion Remastered on Switch 2 because it was on sale, and because an open-world game is ideal for the deeply sophisticated activity of playing a video game while also half-watching television.

    Cyrodiil is big, familiar, and pleasantly indifferent to whether i am paying full attention. i can wander into a cave, pick up seventeen objects i do not need, forget why i entered the cave, and still feel as though i accomplished something. this is basically wellness.

    playing the oblivion remaster and, there’s a quest-breaking bug in one of the mage guild recommendation quests? lovely

    schweg, (@schwegler.lol) 2026-09-04T20:03:36.747Z

    then i reached the Cheydinhal Mages Guild recommendation quest, which asks you to recover the Ring of Burden from Vidkun’s body at the bottom of a well. simple enough, except the body was not there.

    the game had misplaced its corpse.

    The hero of Oblivion Remastered looking across a sunlit Cyrodiil landscape on Nintendo Switch 2
    Official Bethesda promotional screenshot for the Nintendo Switch 2 version of Oblivion Remastered, used for commentary.

    please allow three business days for the dead man to regenerate

    apparently the proposed cure is to leave town and sleep or wait for three in-game days so the environment can reset. this is less a quest solution than an instruction to take a short vacation until the deceased remembers his appointment.

    **apparently** the body in the well shows up if I go into another town and sleep or wait for 3 days so it regenerates the environment but I skipped it and hope by the time I come back the body is there 🤞

    schweg, (@schwegler.lol) 2026-09-04T20:14:36.530Z

    i skipped the recommendation for now. i am hoping that when i return, Vidkun will be in the well, the ring will be on Vidkun, and the Mages Guild will stop evaluating my application through a scavenger hunt run by a broken municipal coroner.

    the best part is that this is not fresh 2026 jank. it is heritage jank. players were documenting the disappearing-body problem back in 2006, when a Nexus forum thread traced it to the game cleaning up Vidkun’s corpse after several days because it was not marked as permanent. the UESP discussion likewise notes that the body may disappear after three in-game days.

    Bethesda’s own support page says the missing Vidkun and Ring of Burden problem was addressed in patch 1.1 for the original game. two decades later, players of the remaster have reported the same basic failure again. the new version restored the textures, lighting, foliage, and apparently the corpse’s right to vanish without notice.

    Sheogorath seated amid the surreal scenery of the Shivering Isles in Oblivion Remastered
    Official Bethesda promotional screenshot for the Nintendo Switch 2 version of Oblivion Remastered, used for commentary.

    on pc, reality has an edit button

    if i were playing on PC, i could probably use a console command, edit a save, or install a mod built by somebody who got tired of waiting for Bethesda to put the dead man back. on Switch 2, i have portability, suspend mode, and the pure console experience of being trapped inside the official version of reality.

    this is where the famous Bethesda charm stops being charming for a minute. a guard walking into a wall is atmosphere. an apple vibrating itself off a table is environmental storytelling. a required quest object ceasing to exist is the game turning to you and saying, with total confidence, “have you considered not advancing?”

    i still love Oblivion. that is part of why this is funny, and part of why it is annoying. the game’s instability has always been tangled up with its enormous ambition: every person has a schedule, every object has physics, and every corpse apparently has somewhere else to be. remastering it without fully taming that chaos may be faithful, but there is faithful, and then there is reissuing the same administrative error in high definition.

    Nintendo’s official trailer for Oblivion Remastered on Switch 2.

    for now, i will go do other quests and let Cheydinhal marinate. perhaps three days from now, the well will repopulate. perhaps the ring will return. perhaps i will become the only Mages Guild applicant rejected because the dead guy missed his appointment.


    sources and media: Bethesda’s August 11, 2026 Switch 2 launch announcement and screenshots; Bethesda support on the original Ring of Burden bug; contemporaneous 2006 Nexus discussion; and UESP community documentation. Promotional images are attributed in their captions and used for commentary.

  • the biggest shoplifters have payroll departments

    the biggest shoplifters have payroll departments

    when a poor person takes from a rich institution, we call the police. when a rich institution takes from a worker, we… Read more →

    I reblogged a post this morning that gets at one of capitalism’s better magic tricks: poor people are expected to conduct an ethics seminar before taking anything from the rich, while rich people can take money from workers repeatedly, call it a payroll issue, and make everyone wait two pay periods for an update.

    The point is not that every act of theft becomes morally pure when the victim owns a boat. The point is that we use the word theft very selectively. If somebody walks out of a store with laundry detergent, local television has security footage by six. If an employer edits timecards, withholds tips, demands unpaid work before clock-in, misclassifies employees, or simply does not pay overtime, the language becomes soft enough to nap on.

    It is an “error.” A “discrepancy.” A “compliance matter.” Possibly an exciting opportunity to contact a human-resources portal that replies from an address named NOREPLY.

    Bar chart comparing estimated wage theft losses with robbery, burglary, larceny, and motor vehicle theft losses using 2012 data
    A historical comparison using 2012 FBI and Economic Policy Foundation data. Chart by Guest2625, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY-SA 3.0.

    the crime becomes paperwork when the thief owns the paperwork

    Wage theft covers a lot of ordinary employer behavior: paying less than minimum wage, denying overtime, making people work off the clock, taking tips, using illegal deductions, or labeling somebody an independent contractor because payroll discovered a fun costume for an employee. None of this requires a dramatic heist. Usually it requires a manager, a scheduling system, and confidence that the worker cannot afford to fight back.

    The scale is not theoretical. The U.S. Department of Labor’s Wage and Hour Division says it recovered more than $259 million in back wages for 176,957 workers in fiscal year 2025. That is only what one federal division recovered through enforcement. It is not an estimate of everything taken, and it does not include every worker who never knew, never reported it, or decided losing the job would be worse than losing the money.

    The average recovery was $1,465 per worker. For somebody living paycheck to paycheck, that is not an abstract line on a labor economist’s spreadsheet. It is rent, medication, groceries, a car repair, or the small emergency fund that keeps one bad week from becoming six bad months.

    Fast food workers and supporters marching for higher wages, paid sick days, and union rights in Saint Paul
    Fast food workers striking in Saint Paul in 2016. Photo by Fibonacci Blue, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY 2.0.

    we moralize downward and administrate upward

    Our cultural response is upside down. Petty theft by poor people becomes a referendum on social collapse. Theft from workers becomes a seminar about how difficult it is to run a small business. Apparently the moral seriousness of taking money decreases as the quality of the accounting software improves.

    This is why the original post lands. The wealthy do not need to snatch cash from your hand. They can take fifteen minutes from every shift, deny a break, shave a commission, hold a final paycheck, or write a policy that makes the theft look automatic. The money still leaves one person and benefits another. It has merely passed through a respectable interface.

    And when a worker objects, the burden reverses immediately. Did you document it? Do you have the schedule? Did you save the messages? Can you prove the manager knew? Are you prepared to keep working beside the person you reported? The employer controls the records, the workplace, and the paycheck, but the employee is assigned a side quest called Evidence.

    The Department of Labor explains that workers may be able to recover back pay, liquidated damages, attorney’s fees, and court costs under federal law. Those remedies matter. So do unions, stronger state enforcement, meaningful penalties, and treating retaliation as the threat it actually is. A right that can only be exercised by somebody with spare time, legal knowledge, and another job lined up is less sturdy than the brochure suggests.

    We do not have to settle every philosophical question about property before noticing the obvious hierarchy. When a poor person takes from a rich institution, we call the police. When a rich institution takes from a poor person, we ask whether they have opened a ticket.

  • you can just stop buying the wizard stuff

    you can just stop buying the wizard stuff

    loving what a story meant to you does not require an eternal pipeline of purchases, reboots, merchandise, and increasingly strained excuses. Read more →

    I never got into Harry Potter. This was not an act of moral courage. I read some of the first book as a kid, did not like it, and stopped. The Sorting Hat failed to assign me a house because I had already wandered off to look at the X-Men again.

    That means I do not have the same nostalgia to untangle that a lot of people do. I understand why the books matter to them. They found the series at exactly the age when a fictional world can become load-bearing, and it followed them through childhood, adolescence, midnight release parties, movies, friendships, and the period when every personality quiz on the internet needed to know whether you were a Hufflepuff.

    i never got into Harry Potter because I didn’t like the first book and never finished it as a kid. BUT, even if I did like it back then it’s not that hard to just not consume media that directly pays for the creator’s bigoted activism to continue to do massive harm

    schweg, (@schwegler.lol) 2026-09-03T10:49:43.910Z

    But “this mattered to me” and “I must continue buying every new thing made from it” are two different sentences. They have been stapled together by an entertainment industry that would very much prefer nobody notice the seam.

    The seven British-edition Harry Potter books arranged together
    Photo by Mo HH92, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY-SA 3.0.

    the old books are not asking for more money

    Nobody is coming into your house to confiscate the battered paperbacks you already own. Nobody can retroactively remove the friends you made through fandom, the comfort you found in the story, or the fan fiction that was probably doing more interesting things with the premise anyway. Memory is not a subscription service. It does not stop working when you decline to purchase the reboot.

    The current franchise, however, is a business. New books, games, licensed merchandise, theme-park trips, and television adaptations are transactions. J.K. Rowling remains publicly connected to the Wizarding World, and her own website describes her as a campaigner on sex and gender issues. It also promotes her privately funded legal organization, which finances cases intended to establish and enforce “sex-based rights.” That is not an inference assembled from a haunted corkboard. The fund says what it does on its own website.

    So the familiar defense that buying one game or watching one new series is too indirect to matter feels increasingly unserious. Of course one purchase does not single-handedly finance a court case. That is how mass consumer products work. No individual soda purchase builds an entire bottling plant either, but Coca-Cola has somehow managed to acquire several.

    A transgender Pride flag flying outdoors against the sky
    Photo by the UK Foreign and Commonwealth Office, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY 2.0.

    there are ways to keep the memory without feeding the machine

    Keep the books you have. Borrow them from the library. Buy a used copy if you absolutely need one. Read old fanfic. Rewatch the DVD that has been sitting in a storage tote since the Obama administration. Those choices are materially different from preordering the newest deluxe edition and then explaining that your money is merely symbolic.

    More importantly, let the fondness be historical. We already do this with thousands of things. A childhood restaurant closes, a television show ends, a band breaks up, or a website disappears because somebody forgot to renew the domain. We are capable of loving what something was without demanding an eternal pipeline of branded content. In fact, adulthood is mostly discovering that everything you loved has either ended or been purchased by private equity.

    I do not think people have to perform a public ritual of shame because they once loved Harry Potter. I do think the insistence that a beloved childhood property must remain an active consumer identity forever is a little bleak. The story already happened. You got what you needed from it. The memories are yours, and the corporation cannot repossess them.

    You can just stop buying the wizard stuff.

  • 2
    only you can prevent forest fires, because everyone else got cut

    only you can prevent forest fires, because everyone else got cut

    i reblogged this because it is a good joke in the very specific modern genre of “the public service announcement has returned… Read more →

    i reblogged this because it is a good joke in the very specific modern genre of “the public service announcement has returned to clarify that the public service was laid off.”

    Two-panel Smokey Bear meme: first, Only YOU can prevent forest fires; second, No, I’m being serious. We’re defunded, so you’re on your own.
    Image by depsidase on Tumblr, reposted by Andrew; used for commentary.

    unfortunately, the joke has excellent timing. as of September 2, California’s Plaskett Fire had grown to 27,580 acres with 1% containment, making it the state’s second-largest wildfire of 2026. nearly 1,000 people were assigned to it. the nearby Timber Fire had already burned more than 25,000 acres. together, suppression costs had reached roughly $80 million.

    meanwhile, the people who actually do the prevention, logistics, science, maintenance, dispatching, and suppression have spent the year explaining that a fire response system is more than the visible person holding a hose.

    “frontline” is doing a lot of work here

    the Forest Service says it exceeded its operational-firefighter hiring target for 2026, expanded premium pay, and issued more than 22,000 red cards authorizing personnel for fire assignments. that is important, and it is better than failing to hire firefighters. it also does not make the larger staffing problem imaginary.

    the National Federation of Federal Employees says the administration cut the Forest Service budget by $438 million, or 24%, in March. conservation groups have estimated that the agency lost 5,860 employees by January 2026, including staff with fire qualifications. those numbers include people outside dedicated suppression crews, which is precisely the point: you cannot run a national emergency operation using only the employees whose job title looks dramatic in a press release.

    A Bureau of Land Management wildland firefighter sprays water onto flames on a smoky forest floor.
    Bureau of Land Management firefighter during a prescribed-fire operation. Photo by Colby Neal/BLM, via the U.S. Department of the Interior.

    wildfire prevention depends on prescribed burns, fuel treatments, weather and fire-behavior research, equipment, road and trail crews, aviation, communications, grants, local coordination, and enough administrative capacity to move all of it where it needs to go. the Forest Service’s own research arm says wildfire losses exceed $40 billion annually and estimates a seven-dollar return for every dollar spent on fuel treatments and forest management informed by fire research.

    this is why the old Smokey Bear slogan has always been a little strange. yes, please extinguish the campfire. do not launch fireworks into crispy grass. personal responsibility remains available at no additional charge. but “only you” was never literally true. preventing a landscape-scale disaster is collective work, performed by public institutions before, during, and long after the flames appear.

    the bleak version of the slogan is not that individual choices do not matter. it is that government can cut the system, point at the individual, and call the transfer of risk “responsibility.” Smokey is still wearing the hat. apparently he is also covering three vacancies, processing his own travel voucher, and waiting for procurement to approve a shovel.

    sources: the Forest Service’s April 30 fire letter, NFFE-IAM’s July 16 staffing and budget statement, the Forest Service fire-research overview, and September 2 reporting on the Plaskett and Timber fires.

  • 2
    we have rebuilt the trip planner as a civil-rights document

    we have rebuilt the trip planner as a civil-rights document

    Erin Reed’s 2023 and July 2026 trans legal-risk maps show more than a bad legislative season. They show ordinary travel becoming a… Read more →

    i reblogged a comparison between Erin Reed’s 2023 anti-trans risk map and her July 2026 update because sometimes a picture does exactly what a hundred individual headlines cannot: it shows the direction of travel.

    the map is not an official travel advisory, and it should not be treated like one. Reed describes it as a qualitative legal-risk assessment built from five years of tracking bills, hearings, court fights, executive actions, and reports from organizers in each state. that distinction matters. so does the fact that people need this kind of map at all.

    the colors did not merely move

    United States map showing Erin Reed's 2023 adult anti-trans risk assessment, with Florida marked Do Not Travel and many states in lower-risk categories.
    Erin Reed’s Adult Anti-Trans Risk Assessment Map, 2023. Source: Erin in the Morning; used for commentary and historical comparison.

    in the 2023 version, Florida stood alone in the map’s striped “Do Not Travel” category. the July 2026 adult map puts Florida, Idaho, Kansas, and Texas there. South Carolina moves into “Worst Laws Passed.” Reed’s accompanying report, published July 13, says Idaho’s new bathroom law can expose a trans person to a felony and a prison sentence of up to five years, while South Carolina expanded its bathroom restrictions to colleges and universities.

    this is what makes the comparison more useful than treating each new restriction as a discrete piece of bad news. laws do not arrive alone. they stack. a bathroom ban sits beside restrictions on identity documents, health care, schools, public employment, and legal recognition. eventually “can i use this restroom?” becomes “can i safely cross this state?” which is a deranged question for a person to have to answer before filling the gas tank.

    and then there is the map for kids

    United States map showing Erin Reed's July 2026 youth anti-trans legal risk assessment; every state is rated moderate risk or worse, and Florida, Idaho, Kansas, and Texas are marked Do Not Travel.
    Erin Reed’s Youth Anti-Trans Legal Risk Assessment Map, July 2026. Source: Erin in the Morning; used for commentary and comparison.

    the youth map is the one that stops me. there is no low-risk category left anywhere in the country. Reed writes that federal policy, pressure on schools and hospitals, and the broader spread of state restrictions have pushed every state to at least moderate risk for trans youth.

    another useful check is the Movement Advancement Project, which tracks more than 50 LGBTQ-related laws and policies in real time. its current gender-identity policy scores put 22 states, plus three territories, in the negative category. it is a different methodology answering a different question, but the broad shape is familiar: protections are concentrated, penalties are spreading, and geography increasingly decides how much of your ordinary life the government considers negotiable.

    maps like these are practical tools, but they are also records of policy failure. the country is being recolored in ways that turn moving, traveling, going to school, getting a prescription, or using a public building into legal-risk calculations. we have somehow rebuilt the trip planner as a civil-rights document. very efficient. extremely normal.

    the legal landscape changes quickly. check the dated methodology and state details in Erin Reed’s July 13, 2026 report, and consult qualified local counsel or advocacy organizations for legal advice.

  • 2
    mapquest found the fastest route back to relevance

    mapquest found the fastest route back to relevance

    an ancient mapping service declined one pointless authoritarian branding exercise and discovered that “no” is still a very popular feature. Read more →

    MapQuest, a website I associate primarily with printing six pages of directions and then immediately missing the second turn, is suddenly the most politically relevant mapping service in America.

    President Trump ordered Lake Ontario renamed “Lake America.” Google and Apple changed the label for users in the United States. MapQuest said no, kept the familiar name, and watched people download its app in numbers normally reserved for products they remembered existed before that morning.

    MapQuest is now the No. 1 U.S. app after bucking Trump’s ‘Lake America’ renaming

    TechCrunch (@techcrunch.com) 2026-09-02T20:13:34.306Z

    TechCrunch reported on August 31 that MapQuest had reached No. 1 in the U.S. Navigation category, No. 4 among non-game apps, and No. 8 across the entire App Store. The company said usage had jumped to 50 times its normal level. By September 2, the Associated Press reported that it had topped the free-app charts in both the United States and Canada.

    MapQuest mobile app showing a driving route, travel time, traffic level, and a green Start button
    MapQuest app promotional screenshot, via the Apple App Store; reproduced for commentary.

    the ancient texts foretold this

    I remember MapQuest as infrastructure from the era when going somewhere new required a printer, a passenger willing to read aloud, and a solemn family agreement that nobody would mention the missed exit until Dad had finished being mad at the interstate. You did not “reroute.” You performed a three-point turn in a bank parking lot and hoped geography eventually forgave you.

    Google Maps made all of that feel prehistoric. Apple Maps arrived later, initially with the confidence of a person who had never personally encountered a bridge. MapQuest remained alive in the background, apparently waiting for the exact moment that declining to participate in a pointless act of nationalist branding would qualify as product innovation.

    Map showing Lake Ontario highlighted in red between Canada and the United States
    Map by Phizzy, via Wikimedia Commons, licensed CC BY-SA 3.0.

    sometimes “no” is a feature

    The funny part is that MapQuest says it is not trying to make a grand political statement. General manager Doug Berger framed the decision as keeping the names users already know. This is technically customer service, which now counts as resistance because the baseline is apparently “change the map whenever the president invents a new noun.”

    There is a useful lesson here for brands, institutions, and the many Democrats who react to every absurd demand by assembling a committee to determine how quickly they should comply. People are desperate to see somebody say no. It does not need to be delivered from a barricade. It can be a mapping app calmly declining to pretend that one of the Great Lakes received a patriotic software update.

    MapQuest also released a tool that lets users give the lake their own joke names. This is both clever marketing and an appropriate response to governance by novelty merchandise. If the federal government is going to operate like a novelty T-shirt kiosk, the least the rest of us can do is make better jokes.

    I do not know whether everybody downloading MapQuest will keep using it. Protest downloads are easy, and changing a default navigation app is harder than people admit. But even a temporary surge matters. It demonstrates that refusing to normalize something stupid can be popular, useful, and, most offensive to conventional wisdom, good for business.

    Thirty years after helping America get lost with a stack of warm printer paper, MapQuest has found the route back to relevance. It was apparently just “continue straight past the authoritarian branding exercise.”

  • the movie you loved at 20 gets a vote forever

    the movie you loved at 20 gets a vote forever

    in 2009, (500) Days of Summer felt precision-engineered for being 20. revisiting it now means seeing both the movie and the person… Read more →

    there are two ways to answer “what was your favorite movie when you were 20?”

    you can name the movie from that year you currently believe is the best, after another seventeen years of watching films, acquiring opinions, and becoming the sort of person who knows when a director is “interrogating” something. or you can answer honestly and identify the movie that got you then.

    for me, in 2009, that movie was (500) Days of Summer.

    Without saying your age, what is your favorite movie that came out when you were 20 years old?

    schweg, (@schwegler.lol) 2026-09-02T20:05:54.482Z
    the question was “favorite movie released when you were 20,” not “please submit your revised adult canon after several rounds of peer review.”

    a movie precision-engineered for being 20 in 2009

    (500) Days of Summer arrived carrying nearly every signifier that could activate a 20-year-old in 2009: the Smiths, greeting-card melancholy, architecture as an abandoned dream, Zooey Deschanel’s bangs, Joseph Gordon-Levitt in narrow ties, nonlinear editing, and an elaborate Hall & Oates dance number presented as an emotional weather report.

    Joseph Gordon-Levitt as Tom and Zooey Deschanel as Summer facing one another in a scene from (500) Days of Summer.
    Tom and Summer, framed exactly as a 20-year-old’s certainty would prefer. Promotional still from the official trailer. © Searchlight Pictures; reproduced for commentary under fair use.

    it did not merely have a soundtrack. it had a soundtrack that seemed designed to be imported into iTunes, burned onto a CD for somebody you were pretending not to be in love with, and then listened to while staring out the passenger-side window like your suburb had been photographed by an unusually sympathetic cinematographer.

    the movie understood that being 20 means your feelings are both completely ordinary and, somehow, the first time they have ever occurred in human history. everybody has been rejected. nobody has been rejected with this particular Regina Spektor song playing.

    the embarrassing luxury of identifying with tom

    the first time through, it is remarkably easy to accept Tom’s version of events. he is sad, he has excellent taste according to a very specific 2009 rubric, and the movie is literally assembled from his memories. the camera gives his disappointment production design. even his depression has an aesthetic department.

    Summer writes on Tom’s arm while they sit together on a park bench surrounded by greenery.
    A memory Tom has effectively color-corrected before presenting it to the jury. Film still via ComingSoon.it. © Searchlight Pictures; reproduced for commentary under fair use.

    but the film tells you, repeatedly, that he is unreliable. Summer says what she wants. Tom hears what he hopes she will eventually want after enough exposure to his personality. he mistakes shared music taste for metaphysical compatibility, which is a deeply 20-year-old error and, regrettably, not one that expires automatically at 21.

    watching it now, the “expectations versus reality” sequence feels less like a clever formal trick and more like the whole thesis arriving with labels. Tom is not devastated because Summer secretly promised him a future. he is devastated because he treated his imagined future like a contract she had failed to honor.

    your favorite then does not have to be your favorite now

    this is where the social-media prompt became more interesting than a simple list of 2009 releases. there are movies from that year I may rank higher now. that is not quite the same question.

    a favorite movie is sometimes a time capsule with a runtime. it preserves who you were when you encountered it: which jokes landed, which clothes looked aspirational, which flaws in a protagonist still read as romantic damage instead of a warning label, and which songs could make an ordinary elevator ride feel like destiny had finally started paying attention.

    revisiting that movie is not a test you pass by having the correct updated opinion. you are allowed to notice what aged badly, what you misunderstood, and what remains annoyingly effective. critical distance is useful, but it does not need to arrive carrying bolt cutters.

    the film survived its own aesthetic

    late-aughts indie culture has become easy to parody because it was already halfway to parody while it was happening. there were birds on things. every apartment had a vintage typewriter owned by someone who did not type. men believed that liking the Smiths qualified as emotional availability.

    (500) Days of Summer contains all of that, but it has lasted because its structure is smarter than its accessories. memory is nonlinear. heartbreak is an editor who keeps cutting back to the scene that supports its preferred argument. eventually, if you are lucky, the footage gets recut.

    at 20, I saw a stylish movie about the devastation of wanting someone who did not want the same thing. now I see a movie about the danger of confusing your narration with reality. both readings were sitting there. I was simply seated closer to one of them.

    the official Searchlight trailer, featuring enough late-aughts romantic fatalism to power several American Apparel stores.

    so, yes: my answer is still (500) Days of Summer. not necessarily because it would win a carefully administered ranking today, but because “favorite movie when I was 20” belongs partly to the 20-year-old who answered it first.

    unfortunately, he gets a vote.